More jokes

Some banter from an animated Scooby Doo movie. A slapstick gag put to words.

So do any of you have circus skills?

Fred: I took a circus-arts class last summer.

And what did you learn?

Fred: I worked out on the trapeze a bit, but, uh, I ended up breaking a lot of bones.

You seem to have healed well.

Fred: What? Oh, not my bones. I was supposed to catch this guy and, uh, I dropped him. Onto someone. And they both fell into some other people. Who hit the tent support... which tipped the popcorn cart, which set fire to the audience risers... which collapsed with 48 people sitting on them.

Well, I'm sure it wasn't your fault.

Fred: No, it was. But I did learn a valuable lesson about the trapeze. Don't drop people. Oh, and don't fall.
 
Yeah, didn't bother watching that, based on previous entries. :rolleyes:


Waiting for some real jokes to be posted, it's been so long.

Wait, am I in the correct thread? — this IS a jokes-thread isn't it? Or has it become a joke itself?




Here's an oldy (Georgian!), but a goody...

PROP-A-GATE joe-millers-jests-85.png


From the same era...

A lady of the name Rugg having married a Mr. Price, was asked after marriage how she liked it;
"Very well," she said, "I sold my Rugg for a good Price."



In the 1721 edition of Cambridge Jests, a condemned thief tries to charm his way to a commuted sentence:

"My Lord, your Name is Bacon, and mine is Hog, and those two have ever been so near related, that they cannot be separated."

"Ay but," replied Judge Bacon, "you and I cannot be Kindred, except you be hanged; for Hog is not Bacon, until it be hanged."
 

There were 3 crews that worked for the telephone company. A German crew, a Norwegian crew, and a Swedish crew.​


The foreman told each crew to put in telephone poles for the day and left. At 5:00 PM he came back and asked each crew how many poles they put in.

The German crew chief tells him they put in 9 poles today.
"Good job, head on home" the foreman tells them.

The Norwegian crew chief tells him they put 11 telephone poles in.
"Not bad, see you tomorrow" the foreman says.

Then the leader of the Swedish crew steps up and proudly say, "We put in 3 telephone poles!"
Well the foreman is shocked and says, "You've been working all day and you only put in 3 telephone poles? Those Norwegians over there put in 11!"
"Yes," replies the Swedish man, "But look at how much they left sticking out of the ground."
 
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