More jokes

Dang right. Made in San Antonio by people who know what picante sauce is supposed to taste like.

They're pretty good at making soldering stations too.
 
The Hitchhiker by tboersner on DeviantArt
"The Hitchhiker" by tboersner on DeviantArt


Guy driving along sees a hitchhiker and picks him up, even though it's illegal to do so.

The driver and chap who has newly elevated his status from pedestrian to passenger go through the usual small-time chit-chat but the conversation soon turns to the legality and ethics of picking up hitchhikers...

Passenger: I mean, people gotta get around, man, the cops and lawmakers can't dictate against free will, caring and sharing.

Driver: Right you are! That's why I picked you up, well, that and now I can use the commuter lane.

Passenger: Still, I can see the flipside of the coin — it protects both drivers and hitchhikers against predators or getting robbed...

Driver: I don't know about that, but I've never been ripped off or car-jacked. Where's the protection? I picked YOU up!

Passenger: Well there you go! For all you know I could be some kind of psycho serial-murderer.

The driver starts nervously laughing ...

Passenger (cont): What's funny about that? Seriously, what if I were?​

Driver: Realistically, statistically speaking, the odds are wayyyyyy too low for there to be two of us in the same car...
 
the lispy "yes dear' comes to mind :unsure:
Gal is out golfing when she gets hit somewhere delicate by a ball from the group behind her. She goes to the doc to get it checked out. He asks her where she got hit and she replies between the 2nd and 3rd holes. he thinks for a minute and says doesn't leave much room for the bandage.
3 christian figures aqre out golfing, up 1st is Moses, he hits the ball and it gets to the water hole and it spreads making a path, ball rools through and stops 10ft from the cup. Up next is Jesus, he whacks the ball pretty good but it lands at the edge of the water and rolls right over the top ending at 5ft from the hole. Last guy comes up, slices in to a tree, squirrel grabs the ball and runs up the trunk out on to a bare branch, a hawk flies by, snags the squirrel and sails over the green, squirrel drops the ball and it gently falls in the cup. Jesus turns and shouts "NICE SHOT DAD!!"
 
Feral Feline said:
Driver: Realistically, statistically speaking, the odds are wayyyyyy too low for there to be two of us in the same car...
Click to expand...
Somewhat like;

My statistician buddy told me, the odds of getting on a passenger plane with someone carrying a 💣 are 1 in 27.5 million. He said he always takes one with him, because the odds of there being two on the same plane are astronomical!
 
What did Godzilla call his son?
Jesuszilla.

A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk in to deliver blood.
renderTimingPixel.png

The priest says- “I’m a type A”
The minister says- “I’m a type B”
The rabbit says- “I think I’m a typo”

Bruce Lee was fast but did you know he had a brother who was faster?
Sudden Lee.

Yo mama so fat, when she falls out of bed, she rolls of both sides at the same time.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top