More jokes

The upside to all of this is it made me aware of the Aphex Aural Exciter, a device previously unknown to me. A little googling yielded up a service manual for Aphex Aural Exciter Type III model 250, complete with schematic, parts list, circuit description, alignment procedure, operating instructions, etc. Could this be stripped down to it's essential bits and made into a pedal? I think so.

No joke.
 
Last edited:
Screenshot_20211105-181131_Chrome.jpg

Zooming in. Enhance... it'd be funnier if there were germanium cans and an outie jack in there. Still hilarious. Makes me want to sew a ton of white washers onto a strap like chain mail. If only I hadn't been throwing them away this whole time!!
 
Mentaltossflycoon said:
View attachment 18269

Zooming in. Enhance... it'd be funnier if there were germanium cans and an outie jack in there. Still hilarious. Makes me want to sew a ton of white washers onto a strap like chain mail. If only I hadn't been throwing them away this whole time!!
Click to expand...
Got to save them, they make great spacers for other stuff, like if you don't won't your outie out too far
 
This Program Manager retires from Microsoft and with his large 401K, buys a nice cabin on a huge plot of land in Alaska. He's way out in the boonies, no one around for miles. One day he's startled by a knock on the front door. He opens the door and there's a huge mountain man on his front porch. "Hi there, I'm Jack, your neighbor and I thought I'd drop by and invite you to a party at my place."
The retiree responded "Nice to meet you Jack. I'm Bill. I didn't realize I had any neighbors."
Jack: "I live over on the other side of the mountain. The party's next Saturday, I hope you can make it."
Bill: "Sure, that would be great."
Jack: "I should warn you though, there's gonna be a lot of drinking."
Bill: "That's cool, we did a ton of drinking back at Microsoft."
Jack: "Gonna be some drugs too."
Bill: "No problem, we did our fair share of drugs at Microsoft."
Jack: "I expect there will be some fighting as well."
Bill: "I'm used to that, fights would break out at Microsoft all the time."
Jack: "One more thing, there's probably gonna be some kinky sex happening."
Bill: "Bring it on, we used to have some wild parties back at Microsoft."
Bill: "Do you need me to bring anything?"
Jack: "Nah, it's just gonna to be the two of us."
 
Not necessarily a joke but a prank I have to share.

I was in the shower and heard the door open, the cackle of my son and then the door close. Nothing was said just a quick in and out.

When i got out of the shower i found he took my towel and replaced it with a hand towel. He was waiting outside the door waiting for my reaction.

Then three days later he is in the shower and yells for me to help him, i openup the door and he throws a bucket of ice cold water at me.

He is going to suffer mighty payback.

Although I suppose me dropping him off at daycare this summer and shouting i love you very loudly embarrassed him pretty good
 
One of my favorite April 1st pranks was to call-forward all of my co-workers' phones to each other. The office phones were VoIP and could be configured from a web interface. It was easy to figure out everyone's username because it was based on the first five letters of their last name and their badge number. 99% of them left their password at the default 54321. I was usually one of the last to leave, so on the night of 31 March I set about merrily configuring everyone's phone to call-forward to someone else. The next day, it took them a while to figure out what was happening and even longer to figure out what to do about it.
 
I'm a simple man when it comes to pranks. On a disneyworld high school band trip, they put us up in their band nerd resort with piano shaped pool and giant fake instruments on the buildings. There was no access to beer, no shoulder tapping when you're trapped. Boredom got the best of me so I decided that our percussionists, who were entirely underclassmen, would be that evening's mark. I filled a large trashcan halfway full of water, dumped in a fellow brass player's bottle of brut aftershave and leaned it against their door. Knock knock. I felt a little bad when I learned that they all had their suitcases near the front of the room. They were the freshest freshmen all week.

Another time I snagged a weird, terribly drawn but framed creepy drawing of a mulleted father and son out of a lost and found. Since I had the keys to my bandmates house where were rehearsed, I snuck over and hung it in his living room. It was up for months before he and his roommate talked about it. They just assumed it was the other dude as a kid and accepted it. "The fuck? That ain't you?"
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top