Best Quotes from Amp & Pedal Manuals

[Chuck D. Bones]

This one is from the Friedman Small Box Amplifier manual.

 

[Gordo]

That's funny...

 

[peccary]

We bass players just pretend to not understand you. That or we just nod and say "Oh, okay" and then do whatever we want anyways.

 

[Betty Wont]

The manual for the DOD Buzz Box is goofy. They plead for you to not refer the demons you summon to their customer service dept.

 

[Chuck D. Bones]

From the Metasonix TX-1 Agonizer. Most of the words and images in a Metasonix user's manual are unsuitable anyone with a delicate constitution.

 

[BurntFingers]

Have you read the manuals to the pussy melter or boomerang delay?

Actually, they recently renamed the pussy melter to the butthole burner.

 

[Chuck D. Bones]

Right, because "Pussy Melter" was too rude. I'll have to try that one out on the breadboard.

 

[BurntFingers]

Right, because "Pussy Melter" was too rude. I'll have to try that one out on the breadboard.

The artwork is as puerile as you'd expect. There's some interesting contouring on those chili peppers.

 

[Barry]

The artwork is as puerile as you'd expect. There's some interesting contouring on those chili peppers.

Actually my Mom used to grow Peter Peppers (google it) it's a pepper that is very hot and looks like a Penis

 

[Harry Klippton]

Actually my Mom used to grow Peter Peppers (google it) it's a pepper that is very hot and looks like a Penis

My dad used to grow these but we can't find seeds for them anymore nor do we have any saved

 

[Dali]

Actually, they recently renamed the pussy melter to the butthole burner.

Equality! Everybody got one of these at least!

 

[fig]

this one always pissed me off...."Read before use".

I got news for them, I stopped reading it after about 4-5 uses!

 

[Mcknib]

This pic is apparently a drummer when the guitarist shouted over you're nearest switch my amp on would ya?


Sorry drum chums don't be hitting me with your rhythm stix

 

[The Mighty G]

One of my faves was actually in a build guide by Aion FX, that was clearly prepared with Chat GPT- the instructions say "print out the drilling template and have an adult cut it out for you..."

Surely we can trust you to safely use the drill on your metal enclosure, but get mom to cut out the guide for you!

 

[hamerfan]

View attachment 10774

Don't start me on amp designers...

 

[Robert]

One of my favorites comes from the Box of Rock manual.

The Box of Rock™ is Z.Vex Effect’s first “distortion” pedal, highly specialized to simulate the “everything on 10” sound of a classic Marshall® JTM45 non-master-volume amplifier.

The best way to complete this pedal is to run it through a JTM45 Marshall amplifier head/cabinet on a warm clean setting (try strapping the channels, setting the volumes below 3,and setting all other controls to 6 as a start point.)

So wait, you're saying the best way to get the most out of my JTM45 simulator pedal is to plug it into a JTM45? ....

 

[Barry]

My dad used to grow these but we can't find seeds for them anymore nor do we have any saved

You can find them online, but they're pricey.

https://www.amazon.com/Hot-Peter-Pepper-Plant-Adults/dp/B0CLYSF6HN/ref=sr_1_12?adgrpid=1333708961833891&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.4zMzbT5pc8v1lHmSMO_1h5vedrJ5pGDdvSKFVo6nWe8cAdYzoHyycVvEO6WQbFSnE8in242ue-7lBU1XQ_klYorA-yllaR4MMyxXYKOZ5Q37aOW9f1hry7fsq7mcr0oSw4hLN1_sVC4o7XgDz_HIa1GLrU4V3cINMLMq5WpA_VL3UwYJdiGokiDEyQBz_8bnMJO4OsuSw2GXq_9CQOID2s1GteshMl72zoSNxLeSW8F4B9oJlVNilxrI-1nQyUvFt6RVEIu2g72tow750SmHs8xGb3OWOKJATQMD63Bmq44._xU8rMuGGJivXd6tNhoIHboRr41FHUABTiMOPvy174M&dib_tag=se&hvadid=83357083909875&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=80738&hvnetw=o&hvqmt=e&hvtargid=kwd-83357728515653%3Aloc-190&hydadcr=23608_13532228&keywords=peter+peppers+seeds&qid=1715786997&s=lawn-garden&sr=1-12

 

[Harry Klippton]

You can find them online, but they're pricey.

https://www.amazon.com/Hot-Peter-Pepper-Plant-Adults/dp/B0CLYSF6HN/ref=sr_1_12?adgrpid=1333708961833891&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.4zMzbT5pc8v1lHmSMO_1h5vedrJ5pGDdvSKFVo6nWe8cAdYzoHyycVvEO6WQbFSnE8in242ue-7lBU1XQ_klYorA-yllaR4MMyxXYKOZ5Q37aOW9f1hry7fsq7mcr0oSw4hLN1_sVC4o7XgDz_HIa1GLrU4V3cINMLMq5WpA_VL3UwYJdiGokiDEyQBz_8bnMJO4OsuSw2GXq_9CQOID2s1GteshMl72zoSNxLeSW8F4B9oJlVNilxrI-1nQyUvFt6RVEIu2g72tow750SmHs8xGb3OWOKJATQMD63Bmq44._xU8rMuGGJivXd6tNhoIHboRr41FHUABTiMOPvy174M&dib_tag=se&hvadid=83357083909875&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=80738&hvnetw=o&hvqmt=e&hvtargid=kwd-83357728515653%3Aloc-190&hydadcr=23608_13532228&keywords=peter+peppers+seeds&qid=1715786997&s=lawn-garden&sr=1-12

Thanks. I've seen worse prices

 

[PunchySunshine]

You can find them online, but they're pricey.

https://www.amazon.com/Hot-Peter-Pepper-Plant-Adults/dp/B0CLYSF6HN/ref=sr_1_12?adgrpid=1333708961833891&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.4zMzbT5pc8v1lHmSMO_1h5vedrJ5pGDdvSKFVo6nWe8cAdYzoHyycVvEO6WQbFSnE8in242ue-7lBU1XQ_klYorA-yllaR4MMyxXYKOZ5Q37aOW9f1hry7fsq7mcr0oSw4hLN1_sVC4o7XgDz_HIa1GLrU4V3cINMLMq5WpA_VL3UwYJdiGokiDEyQBz_8bnMJO4OsuSw2GXq_9CQOID2s1GteshMl72zoSNxLeSW8F4B9oJlVNilxrI-1nQyUvFt6RVEIu2g72tow750SmHs8xGb3OWOKJATQMD63Bmq44._xU8rMuGGJivXd6tNhoIHboRr41FHUABTiMOPvy174M&dib_tag=se&hvadid=83357083909875&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=80738&hvnetw=o&hvqmt=e&hvtargid=kwd-83357728515653%3Aloc-190&hydadcr=23608_13532228&keywords=peter+peppers+seeds&qid=1715786997&s=lawn-garden&sr=1-12

Looks like $0.10-$0.50 a piece for just the seeds though.

 

[Barry]

Thanks. I've seen worse prices

I think that first link was actually for plants, this one is seeds:

https://www.amazon.com/Peter-Heirloom-Pepper-Premium-Packet/dp/B00OZW70WK/ref=sr_1_7?adgrpid=1341404749700618&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.4zMzbT5pc8v1lHmSMO_1h5vedrJ5pGDdvSKFVo6nWe-978cZxCD_yuyoXduSqZCozXb0B_T25gZBTD0abLE9AXr7OeiIlQefdBftweIQx7Suw-UBsW3QGV1aGPzzqQEMA42NH0RuQBlOY15CWuGgeqcn6_rcHQh1XQkspi_4oNS9EsTTUfWihWjSVEir9yg2lWgxeqK-OpD7yKLf7h-wPOtusWbIZ0dpDt_qdsdkHRy4ZU-i7hN4JPKKVhLGlBO4ajzPeF8xY45U-fzAGlbjm8TAfKaUNbvUOil7oWcOd-0.gH6-SXxKA6v530SboAKCYCz67sZ8rEUTK5wkKiOvnZ0&dib_tag=se&hvadid=83837867844713&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=80738&hvnetw=o&hvqmt=e&hvtargid=kwd-83838140356948%3Aloc-190&hydadcr=13714_10406488&keywords=peter+pepper+seeds&qid=1715804712&sr=8-7